How's this poem I just wrote? It's called Rose Liquid? - soft air gums
By Slash
Air
And cut
Bone
As soft flesh
And he stood up liquid
Separate
To steel the corner.
Tears and cries;
The echo in the night shaking
And white leaves
And wrinkles
Because the skin of the elderly.
The eyes, the size of the
Silver coins
Opening windows
And spills
In young leaves of lettuce.
Red violin
Percentage of deadwood
With his music,
With easy, push the bow cons
Rusty Chains, Share
Salty orange-red particles in suspension
Be performed only by fleas
He's hiding in the back of a dead cow.
Rose sinks deep fluid
In the clothing industry
Whoever hits Stormwind
His name called.
Hollow faces dancing in the leaves
Case, as white as snow
On a black swamp
This light is absorbed
In its depths.
The leaves fall in
The dark area
When the man's teeth
back into the gums.
Strikes Steel Wedge
Cons Earth
Increase backup
Crispy dead
Mush.
Dear Rose-red liquid,
Stick to the wedge.
Never let it go.
Soft Air Gums How's This Poem I Just Wrote? It's Called Rose Liquid?
9 comments:
It is a very good poem.
It is a very good poem.
I like very interesting! with great meaning behind it!
=]
Metric model of interest to know very well.
I thought I knew where you would start, but I missed the significance of the half.
At first I thought they were talking about light red wine, then towards the end, the blood.
I used to write when I was in college in the late 40s and 50s. My teacher taught me a fundamental lesson: Write simple declarative sentences, what you say to the reader to communicate. I was very influenced by Dylan Thomas. Like his work, I could not understand his writing, but singing for me. Further studies of Dylan, I realized that he was a genius and I do not. Before you can innovations such as Picasso, he has to learn the basics. In short, branched into the surreal Picasso, was a noted landscape painter.
However, I like your work. Keep trying.
I like it, is free of emotion and has a big secret, so you do, good writing and good grammar, well done.
I like it, is free of emotion and has a big secret, so you do, good writing and good grammar, well done.
its prety pretty good!
its prety pretty good!
Very, very nice poem! I would like to encourage you to keep writing:]
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